I really wanted to like “Fever Pitch,” but…well…the headline of my new column will tell you a lot: “No Joy in Hackville: Fever Pitch Fouls One Off.” Here’s an excerpt:

But if watching the Final Four is heroin, then watching Hoosiers is methadone. I get my fix by watching sports movies. And I love sports movies, whether they’re about sports—All the Rights Moves—“sports”—The Cutting Edge—or something else entirely that is treated as a sport—8 Mile, Flashdance or The Big Tease. I identify with the hero, because he or she is almost always the underdog or becomes the underdog at some point in the movie. I love that bizarre empathy I feel for those brats in The Mighty Ducks or for Torrance in Bring It On. It’s a form of cheer sex, I think.

Now, would you please read the whole thing? Thanks.